Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Media Junkie [02]
This is one of my all time Nicholas Sparks books... I really hope the movie does it justice. I'm also anxious to see Zac Efron play a woodsy outdoor man... Can't wait!
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Beautiful.
One thing that's at the top of my wish list is that female perfection wasn't so defined by society and media. I think about myself and the self esteem issues I have and then also half of my friends. So many women think that they are not attractive simply because they ate not getting attention from a guy. Excuse me, but when and why did that become the standard for attractiveness? I have been single a good majority of my young adult and adult life and have blamed caused for that to my "Unattractiveness". Now, within the last year this has changed drastically and in thinking of why it is really because I have gotten more attention from men, I have felt attractive and that I was wanted as a female. I hate that! Why do women have to define their beauty based on the amount of attention they are getting from guys?
I have several friends who are going though this now and are beating theirselves up because of the lack of male attention they have is eating up their self esteem. I look at these girls and just think, why?! They are both gorgeous and I just wish there was more I could do as a friend other than getting a guy to hit on them to make them feel better.
I guess my only hope for this discussing societal bar to be raised is that women and girls will see how beautiful they are, with or without male attention.
I have several friends who are going though this now and are beating theirselves up because of the lack of male attention they have is eating up their self esteem. I look at these girls and just think, why?! They are both gorgeous and I just wish there was more I could do as a friend other than getting a guy to hit on them to make them feel better.
I guess my only hope for this discussing societal bar to be raised is that women and girls will see how beautiful they are, with or without male attention.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Unconditional Love
I've been thinking of my mom all day today... She had to put her beloved pup Owen down today. She is crushed and all I wish is to be there for her. This also got me to thinking about how the relationship her and I have had done a compete 180 degree turn in the past year. I think of how terribly I treated her when I was in high school and wish daily that I could take that back. When my mom got really sick it killed me inside, I had never felt so worried and displaced but then I didn't feel worthy of it, I felt like I had failed her as a daughter. It's only been recently I have realized those thoughts are completely absurd. A mother's job is to love their children eternally and unconditionally. She loved me through my teenage attitude years, no matter what.
To see my mom suffer is almost unbearable. I want the best for her because she has gone above and beyond unconditional love for me. I want to hurt with her, cry with her, and I want her to know I understand. I am learning to unconditionally love my mother as she has always done for me. She is so self-less and would do anything in her realm of possibilities to help someone in need. I want her to be happy. I want her to know how much she is deeply appreciated. I need my mom to see how know the joy, patience, compassion, forgiveness, and love of life within me would be non existent had she not led by example.
My mom has taught me what it means to be brave. She shows me it's possible to love after heartbreak, being independent is sometime what you need, she has taught me to always go after what I love and my desires. She has done a good job at trying to put on a brave face for me, but explaining how to deal with both the positive Bs negative outcomes of life's battles.
She has taught me to be picky with boys I date. Always be patient for the right one because I "deserve beyond the best" and to let someone in, which has helped me in many of aspects
My mother has touched my life. I am a better and stronger woman because f her and the person she molded me into.
I love you mom, always. forever. Xi.
To see my mom suffer is almost unbearable. I want the best for her because she has gone above and beyond unconditional love for me. I want to hurt with her, cry with her, and I want her to know I understand. I am learning to unconditionally love my mother as she has always done for me. She is so self-less and would do anything in her realm of possibilities to help someone in need. I want her to be happy. I want her to know how much she is deeply appreciated. I need my mom to see how know the joy, patience, compassion, forgiveness, and love of life within me would be non existent had she not led by example.
My mom has taught me what it means to be brave. She shows me it's possible to love after heartbreak, being independent is sometime what you need, she has taught me to always go after what I love and my desires. She has done a good job at trying to put on a brave face for me, but explaining how to deal with both the positive Bs negative outcomes of life's battles.
She has taught me to be picky with boys I date. Always be patient for the right one because I "deserve beyond the best" and to let someone in, which has helped me in many of aspects
My mother has touched my life. I am a better and stronger woman because f her and the person she molded me into.
I love you mom, always. forever. Xi.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Media Junkie [01]
"All About Us" by He is We...
This song is beautiful. I highly recommend watching the music video for the first time, it explains the meaning and story behind the song. He is We is a duet who recently had to suspend their your with All Time Low due to health issues with artist, Rachel Taylor. The song is an adorably peaceful melodic mix of a couple in love who are faced with the issue of cancer. The man stands by the girl through her journey and it the video documents their love for one another. It's too cute and has been on repeat for the last 48 hours for me.
This song is beautiful. I highly recommend watching the music video for the first time, it explains the meaning and story behind the song. He is We is a duet who recently had to suspend their your with All Time Low due to health issues with artist, Rachel Taylor. The song is an adorably peaceful melodic mix of a couple in love who are faced with the issue of cancer. The man stands by the girl through her journey and it the video documents their love for one another. It's too cute and has been on repeat for the last 48 hours for me.
Adjust the volume.
I love music. Actually, I loath music. There are times listening to music is like escaping into an abyss of emotion, good and bad. When I am in a bad mood, I listen to songs appropriate to those feelings. Let's take loneliness for example. How many freaking songs about loneliness are out there...? Tons. So many people talk about how music is so inspiring and they connect with it and whatever other sappy monologue they can come up with. Yes, that's great- connect with the music, "be the music" but where are all the artists who wrote about taking the bad feelings and projecting them into good, to overcoming the sadness. So many songs are a constant reminder of heartbreak and loss of love. I need the music that's going to tell me to be optimistic about life; and love in particular.
In today's society, people are controlled by media and they live their every day lives in function with what's trending. I look at the Facebook statuses that my friends post- half of tr time they are song lyrics and you can immediately tune into their feelings. I want the music to be adjusted to happiness. I am guilty of this without a doubt, but I want to live on a different radio frequency. •
In today's society, people are controlled by media and they live their every day lives in function with what's trending. I look at the Facebook statuses that my friends post- half of tr time they are song lyrics and you can immediately tune into their feelings. I want the music to be adjusted to happiness. I am guilty of this without a doubt, but I want to live on a different radio frequency. •
endings
Last Wednesday I left for Wilmington, North Carolina with two wonderful women who have played a significant impact on my life in the past 5 years to visit the little town that has touched so many hearts becasuse of a television show that became cemented to our hearts. One Tree Hill, to those who don't watch is more than likely seen as just another teenage drama to take up an hour a week of girl's lives. To me, One Tree Hill has played more of an impact than ever in my life.
The "little show that could" will air for its ninth and final season in January. Filming for the finale episode of the show ends tomorrow and I was able to expierence the last few days of filming in Wilmington with the two who started it all for me. Marissa is a friend nothing can replace. I think of our up's and down's and am taken through a nauseaus roller coaster ride. When you get off the roller coaster, you feel better than ever. You are reminded that there is still solid ground to walk hand and hand on. I am blessed to have Marissa in my life. I am blessed to know her and am comforted knowing she will always hold a special place in my heart.
One Tree Hill has connected me to characters, relationships and moment that may have otherwise swallowed me. I think of the rebel off the wall character of Peyton Sawyer and her earth moving relationship with Lucas Scott. Peyton's love for Lucas was eternal, yet she was strong enough to let him go to make him happy, even as she sat and suffered. "If what you want is for me to let go, then I'm going to do it... Be happy, Luke; I want that with all of my heart." Peyton's courage to let go in season 5 was earthshaking for me to let go of a relationship that held me captive.
While this is the end of One Tree Hill, I'm reminded to hold relationships and moment close and dear to my heart and to live every second of every day with as much happiness and joy as the one before. "Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swaps of the not quite, the not yet, and the not at all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists. It is real. It is possible. It is yours."
The "little show that could" will air for its ninth and final season in January. Filming for the finale episode of the show ends tomorrow and I was able to expierence the last few days of filming in Wilmington with the two who started it all for me. Marissa is a friend nothing can replace. I think of our up's and down's and am taken through a nauseaus roller coaster ride. When you get off the roller coaster, you feel better than ever. You are reminded that there is still solid ground to walk hand and hand on. I am blessed to have Marissa in my life. I am blessed to know her and am comforted knowing she will always hold a special place in my heart.
One Tree Hill has connected me to characters, relationships and moment that may have otherwise swallowed me. I think of the rebel off the wall character of Peyton Sawyer and her earth moving relationship with Lucas Scott. Peyton's love for Lucas was eternal, yet she was strong enough to let him go to make him happy, even as she sat and suffered. "If what you want is for me to let go, then I'm going to do it... Be happy, Luke; I want that with all of my heart." Peyton's courage to let go in season 5 was earthshaking for me to let go of a relationship that held me captive.
While this is the end of One Tree Hill, I'm reminded to hold relationships and moment close and dear to my heart and to live every second of every day with as much happiness and joy as the one before. "Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swaps of the not quite, the not yet, and the not at all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists. It is real. It is possible. It is yours."
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